Free Write 10-16-12

This last weekend was so relaxing. I needed it so badly, it was great having dad at the house for  a week. I hate him not being at the house and seeing him everyday. But what I really hate is how much he is struggling. I wish there was a way that I could help him out. Im just glad he felt ok to ask me to help him out with some gas and asked for mine and Calebs help last night. I wish that he didnt have to live like this. It hurts me to see him not being able to put gas in his car. I just wanted to cry last night when he called and told us he was out of gas. Im not sure how I feel about mom meeting Tonys family. And I dont know that I fully believe that he was going on a business trip at the same time she was to the same place she was. I just wish she would be honest with me and tell me what is going on. I do feel like it is too soon for her to have already brought a guy around. I have no problem with her dating but I think to go ahead and introduce him to Zach and I was a huge step and I feel like she jumped into very quickly. And im not sure what it is but lately he has really been annoying me whenever he is around maybe its just because I dont like the situation or it makes me uncomfortable im not sure. He is a very nice guy but some of the things he does annoy me so much. I just want my family back or I just want to start my life with Caleb. I am so ready to move out, being away from him at night is getting harder and harder I just love being with him and spending time with him. He makes me so happy and I just want to start our life.